Dysfunctional Programming account #1. Senior SWE. I still write C++ for money. ex-Haskell, ex-OCaml. All opinions are my own.
London, UK
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Wanna become a C++ expert? Good news, everyone!
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And because you endured all my shitposts, you get a generous 40% discount. I reward your loyalty.
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It's time to git gud. #ad
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For a very long time, my account was censored, and I couldn't say the things I wanted to say.
I'm finally free.
You're not going to believe what I'm about to tell you.
BREAKING: Microsoft, $MSFT, is offering buyouts to 60,000 workers as part of the company’s efforts to cut costs amid AI adoption, per Bloomberg.
Personnel on select teams in the US, Canada, India, and the UK at a vice president level and below will be eligible.
This reflects ~27% of Microsoft's total workforce.
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Translating this news to the American measurement system for my overseas friends.
China just lost one and a quarter of Anthropic.
The AI bubble is starting to pop in China.
The Chinese stock market has lost over $2,400,000,000,000 since its May 2026 peak, in large part because people realized AI investments are losing everyone money.
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System Design is just DSA on another level of abstraction.
If you’re good at problem-solving, both LeetCode and System Design will be straightforward to you.
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You’ve been working on a big feature for a month. You go on a 3-week vacation before finishing, so naturally, you have to hand it over.
You return and it’s still not done.
Do you reassign the task back to yourself?
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This single shell command will save you millions of tokens on renaming variables.
Bookmark this.
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Accidentally discovered unexpected C++ ADL behaviour.
In retrospect, it makes sense once you know the rule. It's just that the rule is the opposite of my default expectations.
I tried to make a simplified real example.
What should the following code print, in your opinion?
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Guess who followed me after this post
I've seen people trying to dunk on Tim Sweeney for being just a billionaire who doesn't know how to code, while he's literally one of the most cracked devs out there.
Yet some people have no idea about his background.
And here I am, a nobody, worrying that people don't know my background and thinking I'm just a dumb shitposter/tech influencer.
If people want a summary of my past work, I might write something up.
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I've seen people trying to dunk on Tim Sweeney for being just a billionaire who doesn't know how to code, while he's literally one of the most cracked devs out there.
Yet some people have no idea about his background.
And here I am, a nobody, worrying that people don't know my background and thinking I'm just a dumb shitposter/tech influencer.
If people want a summary of my past work, I might write something up.
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We’ve actually been in singularity for the last 300k years.
Humans existed only for 0.002% of the whole Universe’s age.
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I’m in the loo. It has 4 washing sinks and 3 soap dispensers between them.
Four people are washing their hands simultaneously rn.
I’ve been preparing for this moment my whole life.
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AI is surprisingly good at understanding software.
It is, unfortunately, excruciatingly bad at explaining it.
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Hey guys, can you check if my personal project is safe against the recent vulnerabilities?
It’s here
localhost:3000
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Notice how none of them are C++ services.
C++ remains the safest language.
The undefeated king still sits on the throne.
October has been an absolute nightmare for software
> Railway - customer secrets exposure
> LiteLLM - malicious PyPI + Docker releases
> Zeabur - infrastructure breached
> OpenCode - AI API keys exposed
> OVHcloud CLI - official binaries backdoored
> Rank Math PRO - malware in official plugin
> TeamUpdraft - customer data compromised
> ConnectWise - cloud backup identities compromised
> Tensorlake - npm package infected
> SubQuery - backdoored npm package
> GhostAction - GitHub repos with malicious workflows
> PHP - critical RCE vulnerabilities
> Node.js - security vulnerabilities patched
> eMudhra - certificate authority keys compromised
> Tailscale - eMudhra incident
At this point, the biggest security risk might not be the code we write, but the code we trust...
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I non-ironically believe that humans will learn to manipulate matter on molecular or even atomic level.
This will enable turning any material into another, and all commodities will immediately lose their value.
The first step towards this future is already done.
In 2025, we published a bold proposal to use fusion reactors for gold production.
And now we’ve done it: Mercury transmuted into stable gold, using fusion neutrons, at 10x the record set by CERN in 2025.
We’ve reduced alchemy to a series of difficult but tractable engineering problems.
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I just spent 2 hours doing a manual task instead of automating it in 3 days.
They’re going to revoke my SWE license now.
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