Why is gratifying oneself to pornography sinful?
I think it helps to consider what God designed sexual pleasure to accomplish.
God designed sexual pleasure to be experienced within marriage, strengthening the bond between husband and wife through an expression of mutual, self-giving love.
Interestingly, even outside religious circles, psychological research has found associations between pornography use and increased anxiety, depression, and psychological distress.
From a Christian perspective, this shouldn’t surprise us.
Pornography takes sexual pleasure intended to be shared between husband and wife and turns it into an experience centered on oneself. An image becomes the focus of sexual gratification, but there is no mutual intimacy, no shared affection, and no spouse receiving that love.
The experience is a distortion of intimacy, and it cannot fulfill the purpose for which God designed intimacy.
Something intended to be an expression of self-giving love has become an act of self-serving gratification.
Now consider Christian charity.
God commands us to love one another, honor one another, bear one another’s burdens, and imitate the faith of those who have gone before us.
These commands are intended to produce genuine love, service, and fellowship within the body of Christ.
And this is where I see a parallel with icon veneration.
Those who venerate icons understand their gestures of affection and reverence toward an image as expressions of love and honor toward the person depicted.
But just as an image cannot participate in the mutual intimacy of marriage, an image cannot itself receive our love, affection, or service.
The question, then, is whether performing devotional gestures toward that image actually communicates love to the person represented, or whether it merely creates the appearance of expressing love without accomplishing what Christian charity was intended to accomplish.
I believe Scripture gives us a much clearer way to honor the saints: by remembering their faith, imitating their example, and loving the brothers and sisters Christ has placed before us.
The parallel is not that sexual pleasure and Christian charity are the same thing, but that both can be distorted when an image takes the place of genuine human connection.
Gratifying oneself to pornography perverts God-ordained intimacy. I would argue that icon veneration can likewise pervert God-ordained Christian charity.
In both cases, the appearance, experience, or imitation of love should not be confused with the fulfillment of its purpose.