For a very long time, I didn’t want kids because I thought kids were annoying. Everyone told me “oh don’t worry, it’s completely different when they’re yours.”
I can finally say that they were right! It’s way more annoying when it’s your own kid
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Ok but did Gandalf *click click* the tongs together before taking the ring out of the fire?
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Jess Brohard retweeted
Man sits by me on train.
MAN: Loads of psychopaths around here
ME: Really?
MAN: Loads mate
ME: How'd you know?
MAN: There's signs aren't there?
ME: I guess?
MAN: I love them
(47 minutes of awkward silence.)
Man leaves train, he has a bike. I realise he was saying 'cycle paths'.
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>the immense disappointment I felt upon learning that the Reading Festival is a festival in a place called Reading and not a festival for everyone to meet up and read 😔
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Two inversions from my first silks class - I think I liked hoop more overall but silks were also super fun!
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Jess Brohard retweeted
BACK IN THE MIDWEST THIS NOVEMBER
Tickets go live this Friday! First time hitting Michigan and Indiana. Can’t wait to party with y’all then!
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