It’s polling day in the only democracy in the Middle East that is carrying out a genocide—and the big question on every Zionist’s lips is: Should we choose the guy who is currently destroying Gaza, or one of his rivals who think they could do a better job? Prime minister Voldemort seems unlikely to win this time around, but he might hold onto power if he can form a coalition with some of the most evil villains in existence. Again. Many Zionists think it’s time for Voldemort to step aside, but I don’t think we should forget his contribution to the Greater Israel Project. He’s the guy who funnelled $1 billion to Hamas and then ignored warnings about October 7 so he had an excuse for genocide. If it wasn’t for Voldemort, Gaza would still be standing, so we owe him a lot. On the down side, he keeps losing fights to Iran and also to an 11-year-old boy, and that’s a bit embarrassing. Voldemort’s main challenger is Sauron. He’s a controversial character because he prefers a moderate approach to genocide. He wants to make Israel look respectable while it expands its borders to encompass all of Middle Earth. The former IDF chief is known for his patient approach towards Lebanon known as the Dahiya Doctrine. Here’s what he once said about it: “What happened in the Dahiya quarter of Beirut in 2006 will happen in every village from which Israel is fired on... We will apply disproportionate force on it and cause great damage and destruction there.” Sauron has criticised Netanyahu for security failings on October 7, but he could not explain how he would’ve started genocide without those failings. The incoherence of his message is Sauron’s biggest weakness, but if he’s finally got the One Ring, this race is over. Western liberals are hopeful that a nice guy like Sauron can take control of Israel so that they can blame the country’s recent crimes on Voldemort. If he loses, there’s a real chance that Voldemort could face the wrath of the law. No, not for genocide, silly! Israelis will give Voldemort a medal for that. But he might have to pay one or two of the parking fines he’s been dodging. Accountability for politicians is what separates a real democracy like Israel from all those savage countries that it can’t stop bombing. Voldemort actually wanted to start bombing Iran again, so he could postpone repayment of those parking fines. However, the current IDF chief is too principled for that. He doesn’t want to start an illegal war until the matter of those parking fines is resolved. The other challengers in this election—Darth Vader, Skeletor, Mumm Ra, Mr Burns, Bowser, and Hannibal Lecter—are unlikely to win outright, but depending on how things pan out, could still find themselves as part of a coalition. Their views on genocide are certainly interesting. For example, Darth Vader wants to fire a Death Star at the last partially functioning hospital in Gaza, and publicly execute his opponents with a psychic throat grab. Skeletor wants to create a cosy holiday resort in Gaza and hopes to rebuild Castle Greyskull over the bones of Palestinian children. And Hannibal Lecter is eager to turn Gaza into a human cattle ranch. The other contenders are far too moderate for my liking and are best ignored. All that matters is that whoever wins, Palestinians will keep getting murdered, Trump will be blackmailed into restarting the Iran war, an Epstein statue will be built in Jerusalem, and everyone who criticises this insanity will be called an antisemite.

U.S. politicians: “israel is the only democracy in the middle east ♥️” netanyahu’s son: “allowing brown people to vote is an existential threat”

“We’ve built software to track Wikipedia editors,” says the head of the ADL. We have an investigation publishing soon about pro-Israel manipulation of Wikipedia, and he just blurts it out

Singh "When we've been talking about the £400 increase in energy bills which is going to come straight after xmas.. didnt the chancellor need to do more?" Hazarika "Govts have given huge bailouts on energy & we just couldn't afford to do it" Yes we can but Labour decided not to

BREAKING: Margaret Thatcher was a massive socialist 👀

Nothing beats watching Jews explain why Zionism is racism. In their own words, no less.

The government's plan is unraveling fast. While families suffer the banks are celebrating getting off lightly. The choice is clear - either we boost incomes and cut bills, or this country risks falling further into despair and distrust.

I'm losing my mind. Millions of Muslim and Arab Americans were told in '24 to ignore a genocide in which some of them lost multiple family members and vote for Biden/Harris to stop the GOP. They were "expected" to do it. And no one is "bigoted" against Stevens - she's not Jewish.

Stayt: Energy bills are going up in Jan by up to £469. You're giving £100. Its not going to make enough difference Healey: "its fair.. & honest to say there's no way that govt can offset entirely the pressures people are facing" You could do lots more. You're choosing not to

This is so poor. The Labour Government are utterly failing to meet the scale of this moment. And all because they're committed to the status quo. It's urgently time for change. Join.greenparty.org.uk

Despite what the media constantly tells you, the United States is the true rogue state in the world.

We've waited patiently for a plan to end neoliberalism. We won't wait anymore. We need rent controls We need a wealth tax We need *serious* cuts to energy bills Instead it's a few pence off gherkins & a payout which the experts say won't touch the sides on energy bills.

Giving £10 billion to Ukraine in the UK budget in a year when living standards for ordinary people are dropping again significantly, is an act of hubris that I think has finally broken public support.

Israel's had only four Arab ministers in its history and has tried to ban Arab parties multiple times, including this year. Zionist parties refuse to work with Arab parties and Jewish citizens call the Arab vote "terrorism". Over 5.5 million Arabs aren't allowed to vote.

Really unfortunate coincidence how these accidents keep happening when countries upset Israel and their computer/security contracts are with Israel. It's inexplicable.

It's amazing how the "welfare budget is out of control" people aren't asking the chancellor where £10 billion for Ukraine is coming from

Portes "Theres a lot of nonsense talked, including on Sky, about the spiralling welfare bill.. as a proportion of our national income.. its lower than it was 15yrs ago & its pretty much back to what it was under Thatcher.. this idea its out of control is just wrong" Spot on!

BREAKING: Huge confusion as Brazilian man not taken into ICE custody despite illegally entering US without a passport 👀

Oh no, this might discourage landlords from buying up housing stock, artificially inflating prices while profiteering from the people who have real jobs😭😭😭

BREAKING: Tommy Robinson faces up to ten years behind bars as the jury found him guilty on all charges while he cried in his high chair 😭😭😭