I will make your #SQLServer faster in exchange for money. linktr.ee/darlingdata
New York
- Tweets 27,594
- Following 119
- Followers 5,052
- Likes 40,781
Pinned Tweet
You can get all my SQL Server training and consulting services in one place. Learn how to fix problems on your own, or get immediate help: training.erikdarling.com/
9
1,100
SQL Server has had row versioning since 2005.
2005. YouTube launched that year.
You have been slapping NOLOCK on things longer than YouTube has existed.
Read Committed Is Cruel by Default: my #PASSDataSummit West session.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
2
144
🎥 SQL Server Performance Office Hours Episode 93 piped.video/watch?v=yln9L1Ql… 🎥
193
Performance Studio 1.31.0 is out. Suppress one finding by query hash in .planview.json, with a reason, and CI stops failing on it. Expensive operators also stops charging row mode operators for batch mode CPU.
Thanks to Neal Mummau for the ask.
github.com/erikdarlingdata/P…
1
4
191
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A key lookup.
A key lookup who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A key lookup.
It does this four million more times.
Key lookups, nested loops, and other repeat offenders at my #PASSDataSummit West precon.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
138
Darling Data retweeted
This is going to be a great talk. Thomas is a hardcore database performance engineer and Floe is an interesting system: db.cs.cmu.edu/events/andy-at…
Today's "Andy at Sea" Database Seminar Speaker: Thomas Kejser will discuss how the internal architecture of the Floe lakehouse query engine (floedb.ai). Public Zoom talk at 4:30pm ET. YouTube video available after: db.cs.cmu.edu/events/andy-at…
1
4
172
11,168
Darling Data retweeted
I’ve been fully remote since 2008. Never been happier. People were miserable far before remote work became common.
5
8
432
17,724
llms have done a lot to democratize capability, giving just about anyone the opportunity to build just about anything, big or small.
these are increasingly non-technical people, with little to no sense of what their code does or what its impact might be on systems outside of the end result.
that places a ton of responsibility on the technical people reviewing and testing their changes.
at some point, you gotta democratize the responsibility, too.
3
333
🎥 Key Lookups and Index Creation piped.video/watch?v=Pdntmf4l… 🎥
1
243
What did the shared lock say to the exclusive lock?
Nothing. It waited four hours. Then the app timed out and everyone got invited to a meeting about it.
Fewer meetings. Read Committed Is Cruel by Default: #PASSDataSummit West.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
175
🎥 DOP and Tipping Points In SQL Server piped.video/watch?v=dxyCb25G… 🎥
2
164
I inherited a stored procedure today.
The first comment says TODO fix before 2009.
There is a GOTO in it.
This is not a joke. It is a cry for help.
So is my #PASSDataSummit West precon: T-SQL That Doesn't Suck.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
1
3
180
Performance Studio 1.30.0 is out. The planview CLI is now a .NET tool on NuGet, so CI can run plan analysis without building from source:
dotnet tool install -g PerformanceStudio.Cli
Thanks to Neal Mummau for the request.
github.com/erikdarlingdata/P…
157
🎥 SQL Server Performance Office Hours Episode 92 piped.video/watch?v=1hjWtNvL… 🎥
223
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The 9am report.
The 9am report who?
The 9am report, still holding locks at noon, and now the app is down.
One report should not be a hostage situation. My #PASSDataSummit West session can get you out.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
1
2
185
My window function spilled to tempdb.
Tempdb was fine with it. Tempdb has seen things you people wouldn't believe.
Window functions that keep their memory grants to themselves: my #PASSDataSummit West precon.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
1
4
194
PerformanceMonitor 3.10.0 is out now. Free.
The web dashboard gets FinOps, job history, mute rules, and query plans and deadlock graphs right from the grids. One time picker everywhere: type "last 3 days" and go.
github.com/erikdarlingdata/P…
1
3
5
402
next thing you know we'll have to pay for claude's therapy bills too.
theverge.com/ai-artificial-i…
1
219
My therapist says I have blocking issues.
My users filed a ticket saying the same thing in all caps.
We can all work through this together in Seattle.
Read Committed Is Cruel by Default: #PASSDataSummit West.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
3
155
What do you call a WHERE clause wrapped in six functions?
Non-sargable.
What do you call the person who wrote it?
You, eight months ago, in a hurry.
Come make peace with your past. T-SQL That Doesn't Suck: #PASSDataSummit West precon.
passdatacommunitysummit.com/…
3
171