Learn something new every day. Some days this is easy; some days, you have to claw for it. Do it anyway. To learn is to grow.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to: Johns Hopkins Alzheimer’s Disease Research Center Fund    alzresearch.org/giving/ Alzheimer’s Foundation of America Caregiver Resources     alzfdn.org/donate/ Photo Credit: Tommy Garcia

I've existed on the Internet long enough to see us go from "You can't refuse to host content just because it's illegal!" to "You may not access that publicly-available information, citizen."

I see how some people can watch flashy robot demos on the timeline and think with a shiver that the robot apocalypse is around the corner, but reality check: There is no robot in the world that can change the batteries in a jack-o-lantern. If you have a robot friendly door handle it might be able to walk outside, pick it up, and carry it back inside. The robot could open the drawer with your batteries in it, but then things get tough. Opening the package of AA batteries? Extracting a precision screwdriver from its case? Unscrewing four tiny screws that require a hard press and twist? Popping batteries out of the case? Yes, you could build and train a specialist robot to do that today, but there is a very long way to go to replace the full range of human capabilities. Near term doomer scenarios should stop at “secretly controlling humanity” instead of “wiping humanity out” 😀

🦔Microsoft is offering voluntary buyouts to about 60,000 employees in the US, Canada, India and the UK, according to a company memo Business Insider obtained. People who accept leave at the end of the year with terms similar to Microsoft’s standard severance, which ran up to 39 weeks of base pay in its layoffs earlier this year. It follows a retirement buyout Microsoft offered to about 9,000 employees earlier in 2026. My Take Buyouts let a company shrink without the headlines that come with layoffs, and Microsoft’s memo calls this giving employees “more ways to shape their next chapter.” Microsoft keeps spending heavily on AI data centers, and payroll is the cost it can cut fastest. American Express cut about 5% of its staff last week and said it needed to “prepare for AI,” and the same reason keeps showing up whenever a company trims headcount. The people most likely to take a buyout are usually the ones who can land a job somewhere else, so companies often lose some of their best people first. Everyone who leaves also walks into a job market where big companies barely hire. More of big tech will copy this before year-end, since it cuts costs quietly and keeps the word layoff out of the news. Hedgie🤗

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OMG the Commodore 64 looks awesome. @mkheck FYI 😄

So basically, today PHP got two critical bugs that let anyone run code on your server without even logging in, which is bad, and then the details leaked before the patch was even out, which is worse, and it works on WordPress and MediaWiki and Magento and Joomla and Laravel, and Censys says like 1.5 million servers are running a version with no fix, so the NSA was like "take your system offline," and the FBI was like "take your system offline," and CISA and the UK and CERT-EU were all like "take your system offline," and then the Prime Minister of Japan, the actual Prime Minister, posted at 5:55 in the morning telling 48.8 million people to take their system offline, so everyone took their system offline, like the Dutch cybersecurity agency took its own website offline, and the Dutch parliament went offline, and the Port of Rotterdam went offline, and Finland and France and Denmark started pulling government sites, and Wikipedia went down, and Archive.org went down, and Asana and GOG and Something Awful went down, and the University of Vienna's webmail went down for some reason, and that's just PHP. Because GitLab also dropped a CVSS 10.0, which is the highest score they give out, for a bug that's been there since 2014, so that's every self-hosted GitLab for twelve years, and then LiteLLM 1.107.0 got hijacked and shipped a credential stealer and a remote access trojan in every single wheel and the Docker images, including latest, and you didn't even have to import it, just installing it was enough, and it's the second time this year, and then Railway paused every deployment on the entire platform because someone got into the environment variables, so now everyone has to rotate every secret they've ever stored there, and TiDB Cloud said someone was walking around inside with stolen credentials for basically a month and an extortion group says they took 10.6 terabytes, and Zeabur got breached for the second time in two months and is just shutting down, like the whole company, and Node.js patched remote code execution and a TLS bypass, and CISA says Plex is being actively exploited, and someone took over 300 Tor exit relays to steal SSH passwords, and SafePay ransomware has hit over 600 critical infrastructure orgs, and India's biggest bank filed a data loss incident, and Japan has been in an official state of emergency in cyberspace since October 9, which honestly explains the 5:55 AM post. Oh, and eMudhra, a certificate authority that's issued over 60 million certificates, whose entire job is proving websites are who they say they are, was supposed to be using private keys that are random numbers over a hundred digits long, and one of them was 4. Just 4. And the others were like 66 and 237. Anyway, it's Wednesday.

The clocks fall back a week from Sunday. This is what time the sun goes down that day where you live.

Java 28 is already shaping up to be an exciting release! ☕ Value Objects ⚡ Faster startup with AOT compilation 🧵 Structured Concurrency 🗑️ Smarter ZGC 📦 A native JSON API (finally!) The JVM just keeps getting better 🔥 jdk.java.net/28/release-note… #Java #OpenJDK

🦔Research firm New Constructs called Anthropic “the most ridiculous IPO of 2026.” Its report puts the company’s value as low as $144 billion, about 93% under the roughly $2 trillion Anthropic is reportedly aiming for. By the firm’s math, the higher price would need a 10% profit margin starting now and held for ten years, plus revenue of $3.6 trillion a year by 2035. It estimates Anthropic’s operating margin last year at about minus 175%. My Take I’m mostly with New Constructs here. Revenue growth is the one piece Anthropic has shown, about $33 billion through September versus $4.6 billion in all of 2025, and on that test it’s close to where the bear case says it needs to be. I just can’t see the margins getting there. That kind of swing needs big customers to pay premium prices for years while cheaper models get better every few months, and Accenture already started capping how much Claude it pays for this month. Right now no one outside the company can put an exact number on it without full costs, me included. Still, that price asks buyers to pay up front for a decade of profits Anthropic has never shown (and the founders keep 50.1% of the votes, so outside shareholders get little say). My bet is the S-1 shows a much bigger loss than the adjusted figures, and the $2 trillion target shrinks once people see it. Hedgie🤗 newconstructs.com/anthropic-…

Porsche marketing team launches a once-in-a-decade new car series… on the exact same day that Elon launches flying cars. So now their entire reply section is filled with this 😂😂😂

Anthropic would have us believe that AI might soon be able to end humanity. Meanwhile, we wait for Claude Code to provide a sane way to copy to the clipboard.

If you live in the orange or red, you're going to be hotter than Death Valley today. It's 82 out there and 94 in St. Louis.

Conciseness is a lost art.

Tests? 🤣

Well well well. Well. Bloomberg: Broadcom CEO Likens Many AI Investors to Casino Gamblers and more... Broadcom’s Tan said AI model developers need to find customers that can generate returns from deploying the technology, rather than relying on users who are now “wasting money” on tokens as they experiment with AI. “When you are a kid you go to a video arcade, you play. Your parents give you $10 of tokens, you finish it in 10 minutes and you haven’t learned anything,” he said. “That’s what happening in enterprises today.”

Another metr irregular psyop gurenteed

Hey TWC! Unfortunately, this tracker is inaccurate and an unverified website. Here is our latest status map as of 5:30pm EST.

You know a hurricane is bad when there are now 53 Waffle Houses closed across Florida and Alabama already...

"Vance focused on Microsoft, saying no American company had abused the program more. Microsoft laid off 6,000 American workers last year and received about 6,300 H-1B visas", wow! insiderwire.com/news/u-s-sus…