Sloths... Love... Eating... Fibre... 🥦🦥🥬 With fibre-rich food and 1 TB/s of blockspace from @celestia, staying sloooow might no longer be possible for us >:( Dang it. Feels like another break from the great sleep is nearing. In the meantime, check out the HUGE news:

Trade... With... More... Capital...🦥💰 Our frens at @initia are giving us early access + exclusive deals on @TradeOnStrat, a full-stack onchain prop trading platform. Pass an evaluation, get $5k in real monies to trade with and keep 90% of profits. Read👇 Details in our DC.

It's a vibetrading summer on @botfunHQ All sloths have their codes already What is your agent doing when you sleep...?

SHOTS FIRED I REPEAT - SHOTS FIRED The @eigen_da offices are waking up to damage-control mode this morning, LM 🦥

Just one of many exciting updates to come: @botfunHQ - the vibetrading arena is now open. Sloths, join the Bot.fun Discord and get your roles discord.gg/botfun Your invite codes are waiting for you there🦥🤖

Sloths vs Al? Say no more. The big brain @musalbas has unveiled a new product, not a simple Al chatbot, but in his words, a "totally new product category" built on @celestia. Agents are everywhere. And now Sloths are into it as well. A small group of testers are already sending feedback to improve the product. Don't...stay...lazy

👀👀👀👀👀

lemme tell you something that wasn't on anyone’s 2026 bingo card: Celestia Summer. everyone talks about the onchain agentic economy while Celestia is quietly building the full stack.

It's that time of the year... Hold onto your Sloths

👀👀

We're looking for a small group of testers to try something new before anyone else. It's early, it's closed, spots are limited. You'd use it for real and tell us what works and what doesn't. If u trade onchain and you're curious where AI fits in, apply: forms.gle/LnondoeU4iUAmAUR7

Roots of Trust: Sovereign Tech as the Last Bastion Against AI Totalitarianism panel. @zmanian @cameroncolby @Poetic_Tech @rileynwong @sudo_ml NeoCypherpunk Summit | Berlin 2026

Oh look 🥰 Our fluffy, cute, attention-seeking gooner friend is back, begging for interactions through football takes and rage-bait. How heartwarming 🥰🥰 Welcome back, overlewd. Pretty sure at least two people missed you 🦣❤️🦥🗡️

For reference, @bryan_johnson recommends 8-9 hours of sleep every day. We recommend 20 hours of sleep for optimal laziness.

True form

Let’s talk about revenue. for a long time crypto was more concerned with ideas than hard numbers. but we’ve grown up. we’re at the point in our evolution where revenue needs to come first. at Squid we are lucky to have built out revenue from multiple sources. our frontend fees, our cross-chain onboarding, bespoke builds for institutional and blockchain partners. it is revenue with strong projections, and diverse inputs. can we normalize this?

Exposing your entire onchain history to the world is insane. But you do it with every purchase on your crypto card and every transaction to a friend. That ends today. @AnomaPay V1 is LIVE on @ethereum. Get started: anomapay.app

Lazy... vibes... all... around... 🦥🦥🦥

Going live in 15 minutes on Discord! Don't.. stay... lazy

We took this, and made it a prediction market. Live on XO.

Sloths had a good nap. Time to get moving again