Some of my non-negotiables in marriage. I can reconsider some things, but these? No.
1. Cooking. I can hire all the domestic staff needed, but my food must be prepared by my wife. That is not negotiable.
2. Control. I must be able to control the woman I marry. If you are going out and I do not like the company you keep, I will tell you to stay home and you will. If you are dressed in something too revealing, I will tell you to change and you will obey.
3. Fat. I hate fat. If you are fat, I will not marry you. If you become fat after we marry, I will send you packing.
4. Roles. I provide, you nurture. I support you and you support me. Our roles are flexible, but if you want 50/50 or refuse gender roles, there is no future between us.
5. Single motherhood. If you are a single mother, forget it. No matter how good your character is, I will not marry a single mother. I cannot see your child as mine, and in most cases you will not let me discipline them the way I would my own. You are also likely to cheat with the baby daddy. I am not interested.
6. Work hours. If you work, your job must not keep you outside the home after 7 pm. If it does, you either quit or there is no marriage. You must prioritise our home over your job.
7. Body autonomy (My body my choice ). If you do not believe your body is ours and our choice, not yours alone, nothing will make us marry. Sex-starving me is not an option.
8. Sex. You must love and enjoy sex. Women love and enjoy sex even more than men. If you never initiate or only offer missionary, I cannot marry you. You must be willing to learn, try new things, and keep our sex life active and fun.
9. Financial transparency. For every amount of money I give you, you must account for it and show me exactly where it goes. Before any major spending, I must know and consent.
I am not forcing anyone. These are my non-negotiables and I stand firmly on them.
Above all, love God.